If this is the work of a Great White, my name is Vic Hislop!

Lame. Someone who cries that he was jammed by a Great White Shark and wasn't.

Irresponsible. Media outlets that claim that every single Shark party involves a Great White.

We were about to launch into a vindictive screed about Paul Welsh, the man who's leg appears in the above photo, but then we took a trip over to our friend's house at thedorsalfin.com and his more reasoned tone softened our claspers. After seeing the pictures of a smiling Paul Welsh minutes after the Australian Shark incident which occurred north of Syndey's Mona Vale Basin, we knew that there was very little chance that he was jammed by a White Shark, even a juvenile. This just off the heels of a fatal attack off Florida on a kitesurfer that was initially erroneously reported to be the fault of a pack of juvenile Great Whites; another unlikely event, it was most likely a single Bull Shark. It turns out that today, tooth fragments pulled out of Paul Welsh's shin belong to the docile Wobbegong Shark, a species that is only known to jam if harassed, poked, or say stepped on by an unaware wader. The initial Great White rumor may have been started by "shark spotter" Michael Brown who claims that he saw the Shark and Welsh clinging to a rock "for grim death." So why aren't we taking a dump on Paul Welsh and Michael Brown. Because any good Shark knows that it is better to take a bite out of the bigger fish--the bigger fish in this case being the media channels that all seemed to delight in crying Great White. The Age.com for instance. It is this silliness that fuels irrational Shark fears which feeds the recreational Shark fishing business. Sharks die because the news lies.

The Bacon Narwhal, much more dangerous to your health than a Shark.

--Sharky